Caregivers Need Conversations, Not Terminology

By Jazzmyn Mijic, M.S. B.C.B.A
Posted: July 2026
Category: Caregiver Training , Family Supports

In ABA, we use terminology every day. Words like antecedent, reinforcement, extinction, replacement behavior, generalization, and function of behavior may feel natural to us as clinicians.

But for caregivers?

Those words can feel overwhelming, confusing, and disconnected from real life.

And the truth is, caregiver training is not about how many ABA terms we can explain. It is about helping families understand, practice, and feel confident using strategies in the environments where their child spends the most time.

Caregivers do not need a lecture filled with terminology.

They need conversations.

Think About It Like a Doctor’s Appointment

Have you ever gone to a doctor’s appointment and the provider spoke almost entirely in medical terminology?

Not just one or two words here and there, but sentence after sentence filled with terms you did not fully understand.

You might sit there nodding, but internally you may feel confused, overwhelmed, embarrassed to ask questions, or even frustrated. You may leave the appointment unsure of what was actually said or what you are supposed to do next.

Now imagine that same experience happening during parent training.

Except instead of medical terminology, it is ABA terminology.

That is exactly how some caregivers may feel when we explain strategies in a way that sounds clinical but does not connect to their daily routines.

ABA Terminology Can Be Heavy

ABA terminology is important. It gives professionals a shared language and helps us be precise in our work.

But ABA language can also be thick.

It requires thinking. It requires context. Some words have different meanings depending on how they are being used. And even when the terms are technically correct, they may not always be caregiver-friendly.

For example, instead of saying:

“Use differential reinforcement while placing the behavior on extinction.”

A caregiver may benefit more from hearing:

“When your child asks calmly or uses the new skill, respond right away. When they scream or grab, stay calm, block if needed, and guide them back to the way you want them to ask.”

Both explanations may be describing the same concept, but one is much easier for a caregiver to understand and implement at home.

And implementation matters.

Because if caregivers do not understand the strategy, feel comfortable with the strategy, or believe the strategy fits their home life, they are less likely to use it consistently.

Caregiver Training Should Feel Collaborative

Caregiver training should not feel like a clinician teaching at a family.

It should feel like a clinician working with a family.

Families bring information that assessments cannot always capture. They know the routines, the barriers, the sibling dynamics, the long afternoons, the hard mornings, the community outings, and the moments that feel impossible at home.

When we slow down and have real conversations, we get better information. We build stronger relationships. And we create strategies that are more likely to actually work outside of the therapy setting.

That is where meaningful caregiver training begins.

Caregivers Deserve Clear Language

Caregivers deserve explanations that are clear, respectful, and easy to understand.

That does not mean we “water down” ABA.

It means we translate the science into language that families can use.

A caregiver should be able to leave a session knowing:

What skill we are working on
Why it matters
What strategy to use
When to use it
What to do if it does not go perfectly
How to ask for help

That is much more valuable than leaving with five new ABA terms and no confidence in what to do next.

Use Everyday Examples

One of the best ways to make ABA more understandable is to connect strategies to everyday life.

If you are teaching a caregiver about prompting, explain it through something familiar.

For example:

“If your child is learning to wash their hands, you may not want to do every step for them right away. You might point to the soap, model rubbing your hands, or give a short reminder like, ‘Turn on water.’ Then, as they learn, you slowly reduce how much help you give.”

That example is easier to picture than a long explanation of prompt hierarchy.

Everyday examples help caregivers connect ABA strategies to real routines such as brushing teeth, getting dressed, leaving the house, waiting, asking for help, transitioning from preferred activities, or cleaning up toys.

That connection is where understanding grows.

Start With What Matters to the Family

Before jumping into goals and strategies, we need to ask caregivers what matters to them.

What is hard right now?
What routines feel stressful?
What is working?
What is not working?
What would make home life feel a little easier?
What skill would make the biggest difference for the child and family?

This is part of building social buy-in.

If a clinician chooses a target only because it is on an assessment, but the family is struggling every single night with bath time, meals, hair brushing, safety, or transitions, we may miss the opportunity to provide meaningful support.

Caregiver priorities matter.

When families feel heard, they are more likely to feel invested.

Set Realistic Expectations for Working Families

Many caregivers are balancing jobs, siblings, appointments, school routines, household responsibilities, and their own stress.

So when we recommend strategies, we have to consider what is realistic.

A strategy may be clinically sound, but if it requires a caregiver to collect detailed data all day, run structured practice for long periods of time, or change the entire home routine overnight, it may not be practical.

Instead, we can start smaller.

Maybe the caregiver practices one strategy during one routine.
Maybe they track only whether the strategy was used.
Maybe they start with three minutes of practice.
Maybe they choose between two strategy options based on what feels doable.

Progress does not always require a huge plan.

Sometimes it starts with one realistic change.

Build Slowly

Caregiver training should not overload families with too many strategies at once.

Start with smaller concepts and build from there.

For example, instead of teaching every possible behavior strategy in one session, start with one routine and one response plan.

You might focus on:

How to help the child ask for help
How to support transitions from a preferred activity
How to respond when the child is upset
How to practice waiting for short periods
How to support participation in a daily living routine

Once the caregiver feels confident with one strategy, you can add more.

Confidence builds consistency. Consistency builds progress.

Provide Options, Not Just Instructions

Families need support, not rigid scripts that ignore their reality.

When possible, provide options.

Instead of saying:

“You need to do it this way.”

Try:

“Here are two ways we can approach this. Which one feels more realistic for your home right now?”

This small shift can make caregiver training feel more collaborative and less judgmental.

It also allows the clinician to problem-solve with the family instead of simply telling them what to do.

Ask for Feedback

Caregiver training should include caregiver feedback.

Ask families how they feel about the strategies being discussed.

Do they understand the strategy?
Does it feel realistic?
What concerns do they have?
What part feels hard?
What would make it easier to try?

Feedback gives us important information.

It also shows caregivers that their voice matters in the process.

When families feel included, they are more likely to participate, ask questions, and share honestly when something is not working.

Follow Up Without Judgment

Caregivers should not feel like they are failing because a strategy was hard to use at home.

Home is not a clinic.

Life happens. Children have difficult days. Parents get tired. Schedules change. Siblings need attention. Routines fall apart.

Following up should not sound like:

“Did you do what I told you to do?”

It should sound more like:

“How did it go when you tried it?”
“What felt easy?”
“What felt hard?”
“What got in the way?”
“Do we need to adjust the strategy?”

That kind of follow-up creates safety.

And when caregivers feel safe, they are more likely to be honest. That honesty helps us build better plans.

The Goal Is Not Perfect ABA Language

The goal of caregiver training is not for families to speak like behavior analysts. The goal is for families to feel supported, informed, and confident helping their child in daily life.

Caregivers need strategies they can understand.

They need examples that connect to their routines.

They need options that respect their reality.

They need follow-up that feels supportive, not judgmental.

And most importantly, they need conversations.

Because when caregivers are included, heard, and supported, they are more likely to stay involved.

And when caregivers are involved, children have more opportunities to practice meaningful skills in the places that matter most.

About the Author

Jazzmyn Mijic, MS, BCBA, is a Board Certified Behavior Analyst that has been providing and advocating for compassionate care and supports for children and families with Autism and related disorders since 2011. She develops practical ABA materials designed to support meaningful skill acquisition across real-life routines.

Disclaimer: This blog post is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for individualized assessment, treatment planning, or clinical supervision. ABA programs should be individualized by qualified professionals based on the learner’s needs, safety, medical considerations, and caregiver goals.